This week I did something I’ve never done before… I bowed out of a coaching session with a client. But not without rhyme or reason.
It’s not typical of me, because I am fully committed to my clients and our time together.
This situation came down to the principle of self respect, and I think you’ll relate.
Here’s what happened, and I’m sharing it with you to help you stand more in alignment…
This particular client sent me a text message at our agreed coaching time, telling me matter-of-factly that he had another call and we would do our session remotely afterward. We typically meet in person. Not all my clients get to spend this kind of time with me, since a lot of them are in other parts of the world, and they would love to spend time in person with me.
He offered no specific time to talk later.
I replied for him to take his other call. That was it.
I made a powerful decision right then and there.
I switched off my phone and took myself out for a long walk. If he called, he would get my voice mail.
When I checked my phone an hour and a half later, I saw another text message from him asking what my availability would be later in the week as he would be out the rest of the evening till late. No apology. No reason given.
My response, later, was that we needed to talk in person.
You see, I’ve been taken for granted a fair amount. Mostly because “I’m always there” for others. No matter what. I’ll hear them out through thick and thin. I care deeply about my fellow human beings, but I need to care about me too. And respect myself, starting with what I stand for. Put simply:
I like to be clear on where I stand – it shows focus.
Which means it’s important that my clients are on point so we’re clear on what we’re creating together.
I like to be on point with my timelines – it shows integrity.
Which means the decisions you make now will impact in your life and business today, bringing the completion of your goals closer to you. Not put them off for next week or next month (which explains why most things NEVER happen).
I like to be on point with investing in myself – it shows commitment.
Which means if someone is serious about working with me, I expect them to be on point with their investment because this is the defining marker point on the timeline of what we create together.
Follow-through is key for anything we set out to create. Are you following through on YOU?
I ask because YOU ARE important to me.
I really really truly mean it.
I’m cool with clients calling ahead of time, with fair warning that they may be late because their cat threw up and they need to clean up the mess or whatever… but there’s a level of respect that HAS to be present for any kind of relationship to work exceptionally well. Especially when we sit in this kind of powerful co-creation mode. Especially when you’re making such a powerful investment in yourself, which is what coaching really is.
I decided I won’t be taken for granted anymore.
Because that’s exactly what happened in this case.
It’s not okay to leave someone hanging like that and assume they’ll be fine with it. Doesn’t matter who you are.
You can count on me to show up fully, and you can also count on me telling you when I’m not showing up fully. It takes courage to communicate like that.
It takes SELF RESPECT.
When someone pulls something like this last minute, I know they have missed the mark. They’ve given their power away to something or someone other than THEMSELVES and the precious time we agreed on TOGETHER. And I know they had all the time in the world to call AHEAD.
I work with people who really own who they are. People who communicate effectively. People who lead their vision by how they lead their communications and relationships.
Trust me, communication is something I work on personally. It’s a constant process because every person has a different style of communication. And we are constantly evolving, each one of us.
It took me a process of opening up to ask more so I could create more of what I envision for my own life.
Why am I being so open with you?
BECAUSE I CARE about my time here on this planet and what I do with it. This means opening up and sharing more of who I Am, because it helps me get where I’m going, which helps you get where you’re going.
When I ask you bold questions, it’s because I know the impact that these bold questions make in my own life to drive my dreams and goals to fruition.
When I make bold statements, it’s to help you stay awake to what’s important to you, so you can show up to life and business and realize that.
Do not be mistaken. This client is an amazing, generous man and CEO of a global company with an inspiring vision that I am honoured to help him realise. The reason we’re working together is precisely to develop his profound people skills AND communication skills in order to achieve the greatness he already has within him, which has been obscured by cob-webbed fears and false beliefs.
As much as I was pissed off with that client in that moment (there, I said it), I also know I’ve personally launched a HUGE rocket of desire to elevate the clients I work with, because it’s called me to a higher Me already.
We did talk about it after, and it was clear his ducks were out of line. So there’s obviously more work to be done there to help him get where he’s going.
You get where you’re going by showing up fully to life; to your personal commitment to self and to the people who are ALL IN to helping you fulfill your vision. (tweet this)
That’s part of what unveiling the Genius within each and every one of us is all about.
Otherwise, what are you here for?
You can count on me to help you get where you’re going, but please… do not take me for granted (and neither should you be taken for granted).