I love you but you don’t get to keep treating me like that.

Loving powerfully doesn’t mean accepting all behaviours, especially if they’re disrespectful, detrimental or dangerous. We’ll need to draw the line, no matter how much we love someone. It’s not okay to expect us to keep loving them without amending such actions and behaviours towards us or our relationship. That’s an abuse of confidence, trust and love itself.

A compendium and declaration to reclaim your personal power:

“I love you, but you don’t get to keep; – disrespecting me
– taking advantage of my heart, mind or body
– withholding love, affection or intimacy when you’re upset
– playing mind games
– using my vulnerabilities against me
– controlling or treating me like a possession
– having double standards
– belittling me in private or in front of others to exert power
– projecting your issues onto me as if they’re mine
– ignoring what needs to be dealt with
– treating me like a toy or trophy that you throw away when you get bored
– expecting everything from me and giving me breadcrumbs
– treating me poorly and expecting me to accept it because you think that’s what unconditional love is
– lying or talking badly about me when you know you’re the one who did all those things to me
– walking in and out when you please
– wanting me to be there for you but not being there for me
– running away when you get scared, then claim I’m the one who abandoned you
– devaluing my love and devotion towards you
– using me as your emotional punching bag
– talking about changing but doing nothing about it
– liking my commitment but not fully giving me yours
– blaming me for everything and taking little or no responsibility.”

Remember, people are not their behaviours, though we may not like some of those behaviours. Have compassion because they’re signs of their confusion, imbalance, fears, self sabotage, false beliefs, mental traps. It’s not easy for them or you. There is personal learning in everything, and everyone evolves in their time.

Can they improve? Anything is possible. But it has to be first for their own wellbeing and self love. Meanwhile, hug your heart and make sure you’re not doing any of those things.