When someone avoids responsibility for their part of “keeping the relationship house clean”, hoping the other person will pick up all the pieces or do the hard work for them… this ends up creating an unsafe space for both people in the relationship. Things will become imbalanced, confusing and painful. It will take its toll on both people emotionally, even physically.
Now, some people don’t mind doing all the heavy duty work to keep a relationship afloat. But… that’s their choice.
If you want a good relationship though, you’ll be better off turning any fear or disinterest into a conscious act of collaboration. Otherwise it just hurts both people. One for digging themselves into a hole of avoidance (which can make them feel guilty but not want to admit it), unfulfilled promises, deceptions or lack of commitment; and the other person for carrying the weight of the relationship for both people, sometimes even being accused of lacking or failing at something.
The path to transforming and healing this is to take responsibility for your part in the relationship. Getting clear what that is for both of you, and each of you keeping the house clean together.
Honour your part. Honour your partner. Honour your relationship.
Otherwise, the house will eventually fall to pieces.